What is marriage all about? How can you have the kind of marriage that lasts a lifetime? Whether you’re single right now, dating, engaged, or married, here are 21 keys to a successful marriage.
Keys to a Successful Marriage
- Marriage is the ultimate team, the union, and oneness of man and woman in a lifelong covenant. It’s the team that anchors a family. Marriage is the mirror of God’s sacrificial, unconditional, lasting love for His children.
- Know the difference between being a consumer and an investor in the relationship. A successful marriage is one that adds value, not takes from it.
- Lean on God for your marriage and family. God provides the blueprints for marriage. He is the power source of love, wisdom, and health. God can heal relationships when both in the marriage submit to Him and allow Him to change them.
- Understand the meaning of love. God doesn’t define love by what you want to receive, but rather by what you’re willing to give of yourself. (your time, your will, your emotions, your forgiveness, your resources).
- Marriage is the Christ-like role of servant, husband, and lover.
- Sexuality is God’s good creation for unity and intimacy in marriage, not materialistic, self-serving, physically gratifying, and for entertainment.
- Great sex is exclusivity. A great relationship and great sex are connected in marriage. And, it only happens when your sole target of affections, imaginations, and enjoyment is your spouse.
- The “honeymoon phase” typically last one to two years. You should know that its normal for this euphoria to wear off. You haven’t “married the wrong person,” and you “didn’t fall out of love.”
- Living together and having sex before marriage uses up a good portion of the “honeymoon phase.” Research shows that divorce and issues of mistrust are more common for couples who cohabit before marriage than those who don’t.
- Divorce should not be an option. If you know that you won’t be leaving or divorcing, it forces you to face differences and problems, and work through them.
- Marriage isn’t automatic, and it’s often challenging. It requires intentional and continual effort to be successful.
- The purpose of marriage is less about making you happy and more about making you holy. If you aim to be holy (more like Jesus), you will invite God to mold you, and you’ll experience true oneness in your marriage.
- You can change your marriage by changing yourself. Instead of pointing the finger at your spouse, point the finger at yourself first. Ask God what needs to change in you if your marriage is struggling.
- Romance isn’t automatic. It’s created and sustained with intention.
- Divorce is avoidable. Nothing is impossible for God if you humble yourself and repent from ways you fall short of loving your spouse.
- Heal a hurt quickly with humility. Don’t wait for things to blow over when you’re in conflict. Don’t point out faults or try to minimize the situation. Instead, be the leader and start the apology. A great way to start is “I was wrong. I hurt you. Will you please forgive me?”
A Marriage that Lasts a Lifetime
At Eagle Family Ministries in Bentonville, Arkansas, helps couples achieve a marriage that lasts a lifetime. We offer a wide variety of Christian marriage retreats and Christian marriage conferences for married couples of all ages. We have conferences you can attend on your own or you can schedule a marriage conference or marriage retreat for your church.
We’ll even custom design a marriage conference for your church regardless of your location in the United States. Please, contact us and let’s visit about your ideas and needs today!