4 Types of Harmful Friendships in Marriage
This week is National Friendship Week. Friendships play an important role in our lives, even in marriage. Good, true, and healthy friendships help bring out the best in us and marriage. But some can potentially be harmful friendships that damage the marriage. After all, we often become more like the people we hang out with most.
4 Types of Harmful Friendships that are Bad for a Marriage
So, how do we recognize a healthy friendship from a toxic one? Here four types of friends that are bad for a marriage.
A Friend that Talks Poorly about Their Spouse
A friend in a vulnerable time may find themself complaining about their spouse. It’s bound to happen a time or two. But it CANNOT become the norm. If a friend is continually speaking negatively about their spouse is toxic to your friendship and marriage.
When it comes to choosing friends, we must surround ourselves with friends who WANT to have a good marriage.
A Friend Who Talks Negatively about YOUR Spouse
It may seem like this is a well-known fact, but many couples have so-called best friends who constantly bash their spouses.
We need to let friends know that it’s NOT okay to speak negatively or complain about our spouse. If we don’t, it can perpetuate a negative cycle in our mind and heart that can harm the relationship between husband and wife.
A Friend that Stirs Up a Fight or Discontent
A good, healthy friend will encourage closeness to our spouse and children, not the other way around. A friend that’s not a good influence will demand more of our time or says things like,
- “She has you whipped.”
- “He takes up too much of your time.”
- “She’s too controlling of your time.”
- “You should be able to do what you want.”
Spending time with friends is healthy. However, it should never come at the expense of the family and marriage. Too many nights out with the girls or guys causes suffering in the marriage and leads loneliness. Balance is key to marriage and friendships.
A Friend with a Negative View of Marriage
Sometimes we have friends from various backgrounds and life experiences, which is a beautiful thing. But a friend who has a negative view of marriage, in general, could be dangerous if they don’t respect beliefs or tries to belittle values. In a healthy friendship, the conversations won’t turn “anti-marriage.”
Relationships enrich our lives when they’re healthy, mutually encouraging, and uplifting. God wants us to have healthy friendships that bring out the best in our marriages and families, not harmful friendships that are bad for a marriage.
Happy National Friendship Week!
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Whether you are engaged, newly married, or been married for years, we can help you gain the tools you need for a lasting relationship. Call us today to attend one of our fun marriage retreats to schedule a marriage conference in your area.