How Do You Communicate Honor in Marriage?

Although it is not a word we regularly hear or use beyond our marriage vows, would it surprise you to know that honor was among one of the top needs from husbands? Whether it be at work, or at home, men place a high value on honor and respect.

When you think of “honoring someone” does your mind typically gravitate to someone with a title like a Judge, a president, or maybe even a celebrity? In all of those cases, most of us would intentionally show honor for their position. However, sometimes we forget our husband as someone to honor with the same intention. So much power resides in such a little word.

5 Ways to Show Honor to Your Husband

Get His Opinion First

One way to communicate honor to your husband is to make him a part of the plans. He wants you to ask his opinion, advice, suggestions, plans, and ideas. Leaving him out sends the message that his opinion does not matter and hinders his ability to lead the family the way God intended.

And, if for some reason he doesn’t, show him honor and defer to his decision rather than charging ahead of him. And, if for some reason he doesn’t, show him honor by deferring to his decision rather than charging ahead of him.

Make Him Look Good

What we say to others about our spouse either makes them look good, or bad. Make a conscious effort to speak well about him in front of others, including family members and children. Not only will you build honor for him with others, but you will communicate honor to him in the process.

Be a United Front

In public, and in front of your children, be a team. When your husband is not home, you are the parental authority. However, if he is at home as well, he has the privilege. Whatever the decision, present a united front.

If you do happen to disagree, then discuss it privately instead of undermining or contradicting him in front of the children. It may seem trivial, but disagreeing in front of others can feel dishonoring to him. Being a united front communicates honor to him.

Say it, and say it often!

Who doesn’t enjoy a little praise once in a while? Especially if it is your love language. Some men need more verbal honor than others, but we all love to receive some words of affirmation. A great way to communicate honor (or lack of) is:

  • How you address him. Is it more of a “hey you.” Or, do you use his pet name?
  • What is your tone of voice? Is it stressed, or calm?
  • Is your state of mind distracted or focused on him?
  • What do you say to him? Is it positive and uplifting such as “I love the way you…” Or, is it “you never…?”

Discover your love language here.

Make His Dreams Your Dreams

If someone were to ask you what your husband’s dreams are right now, could you tell them? If not, don’t worry. The good news is, you can ask!

When you were dating, you could probably tell people his dreams with as much accuracy as you could your own. After years of busyness, due to careers and children, it can be easy to forget to dream together. However, you can change that today.

Use the next opportunity you have alone to ask him. It can be on a date night, or just when you put the kids to bed. Get involved by asking intentional and pertinent questions. Find out where you can to help him achieve them. Being actively involved in the pursuit of his dreams is a great way to communicate honor.

Work at it Every Day

Honoring your husband takes work. It may take some practice to break bad habits. However, nothing is impossible with God, especially since He tells us to honor our husbands in His word. And, since His word does not return void, communicating honor will return sweet rewards in your marriage, home, and store up treasures in Heaven.

Eagle Family Ministries fun marriage retreats and conferences help couples learn skills to communicate honor in their marriage. Ask us about designing a Christian marriage conference for your church or organization.

How else do you communicate honor to your husband? Please share your ideas with us in the comments section.

treasure, heart, honor, marriage, Christian life