For many couples, the idea of getting help is scary. You know you need help with some issues in the relationship, but what kind? Relationship coaching might be an option to help you thrive in your marriage. So, what is it anyway?
What is Relationship Coaching?
Just like individual coaching, relationship coaching focuses on making improvements in day-to-day life. It’s a specialized type of life coaching that helps you find greater fulfillment in your personal relationships.
This type of coaching helps you understand your current relationships, set goals, thrive in your relationships, take them (romantic and non-romantic) to the next level, and get unstuck.
They Help You Get Unstuck
While many coaches have different approaches, generally, they work with you toward getting unstuck. Here are three primary areas that tend to be “stuck” points for most couples.
Expectations change the relationship experience. Whether you know it or not, everyone enters marriage (and other relationships) with expectations. Expectations develop from watching our parent’s relationship or from previous dating experiences. Coaching helps you align and develop healthy expectations n your marriage.
Talking about what you expect in the marriage can be challenging, especially if you’re already in a rough patch. A coach helps make space and framework to have the conversation calmly and how to apply it daily.
2. Day-to-Day Practical Application
It’s not the big things or events in life that make up a lifetime. It’s the sum of all the little things—the day-to-day. This is where a relationship lives or dies. Coaches help give practical advice to make the little moments better in your relationship, remain aware of your promises to each other, and teach you how to keep working on your marriage. In short, they help you form good habits of connecting no matter what’s going on.
3. Overall Relationship Function
A relationship coach helps you improve how you function in relationships overall. One of the most significant strengths is that coaching is solution-based.
When you’re under stress (financially, parenting, work, or health), it can be detrimental to you and the relationships around you. This specialized type of coaching offers solutions for your individual life to be better partners and better functioning people.
What Should I Expect?
You can expect your initial session to include identifying major issues, goals, barriers, and obstacles standing in the way of having the healthy relationships you desire.
What Relationship Coaching is Not
Relationship coaching is not “couple’s therapy.” If therapists are surgeons, coaches are personal trainers.
A coach can be useful for couples wanting to address issues happening within the relationship, such as communication, trust, parenting, stress, and more. It can help you clear up thinking, get some perspective, or set inspiring new goals.
Can it Save My Marriage?
A relationship coach might help you untangle love knots, but it doesn’t claim to “save” marriages, but it’s beneficial. It helps you clarify issues and separate what you can control and what you cannot. It brings light to the hidden corners of resentment, fear, avoidance, and more.
Note: If you need help working through trauma or serious mental health issues, we recommend speaking to a therapist.